How I build confidence in speaking in English in Public?

Do you fear speaking in front of a large audience?

Trust me it’s normal.

In fact, mark twin says, ” There are two types of speaker, one is nervous another is lier”

It is absolutely okay to have fear. If you don’t have fear then that is surprising.

So, this is the final stage of learning to speak a language.

  • Stage 1: Learning to express.
  • Stage 2: Tongue Training.
  • Stage 3: Brain training.
  • Stage 4: Confidence training.

In confidence building, we learn 2 things…

  1. Fear management.
  2. Building Confidence.

1.Fear management in Public speaking.

Firstly, one thing you need to understand is we can’t get rid of the fear.

That is the wrong approach.

The correct approach is to manage it.

Depending upon audience size, stage, content, preparation, audience reaction it will vary.

However, there are two types of fear.

  1. Internal
  2. External.

Now, Internal fears are because of the lack of preparation, unaware of the content etc.

This kind of fear even a most experienced speaker can face.

That is why they say prepare well before the presentation.

Now, External fears are because of the spotlight.

When the spotlight falls on you. You tend to be more worried about how you are being perceived.

Maybe in terms of looks, outfit, speech, content, vocal variety, body language etc.

I remember in a live session of the healing, one question was asked to Ritika Nag that “What is different in you?”

She says my attitude! Then she spoke about her attitude, then judge herself, and then spoke about her attitude again in the answer only.

I have done that many times as well but I can’t remember for now.

However, the point was we judge ourselves and instead of focusing on the content, we focus on a lot of distractions.

So, if you are on the stage acknowledge that, and take one deep breath and remove some unnecessary anxiety.

You can do that.

Just realise when you are fumbling, speaking fast, or putting filler sounds etc. Wait for a moment and get yourself back, speak slow and clear… Bingo.

2. Confidence Building.

Confidence comes from winning. It matters small or big but as long as you are winning, you will feel confident.

Simple logic is fighting only where you can win. If you feel like losing then reduce the competition. Never let yourself fail.

However, there are sometimes when failing is also gives you confidence.

Particularly when the competition is an expert in that field.

Because then you tend to focus more on “dude I shared the stage with him”.

I call it the Anchoring technique.

Here, you put yourself on a very high stage, where you have very few chances of winning it but you do that.

You fail badly but after that, if you are asked to do something lower than that, you do it easily.

You feel like I have talked there.

YOU can do it in two ways…

  1. Join public speaking family.
  2. Practice in real life.

It is not either-or but one after another.

1. Join a Practice group.

When you join a practice group you get a real stage to fight.

Always make progress, If you feel like you are the poorest speaker the double your efforts, prepare your speech, practice hard but you need to have that feeling of winning.

2. Practice in real life.

1. Log kya kahenge?

Have you ever wondered ” Log kya kahenge ? (What people will say?)

Want to be a part of an experiment?

Today, make a video on yourself. A video where you talk about yourself that why you wanted to be confident! Vent out all your heart!

Upload it on your social media account.

Make sure to say at the end that “your valuable feedbacks are welcome.”

This is more like making Videos and then uploading them.

Two types of videos you can make…

  1. Prepared speech
  2. Impromptu

2. They don’t reply.

Have you tried emailing Bill Gates?

Of course not!

But is it possible that if you email him, someone will read it and if it is genuine enough you may get a reply from them as well?

You know what I never believed it until I did it myself.

Indeed, I did not email Bill Gates. But many millionaires.

You know what? they do reply. DO you have the courage to email people?

It does not matter. Do such cold emails.

3. Live challenge

Video making is easy after a time but is that the ultimate goal?

Nope!

Once you feel like doing good in creating videos, next thing is to put yourself on live streaming.

Talk about anything, take the audience’s questions. Engage them.

Take up that challenge.

4. Build your own community

Build your own small community with whom you want to stay connected.

Do Live stream once in a while. you as the leader of the community host them, take the responsibility of them.

5. Invite a guest for interview

Find a person in your field but at a better stage than you.

Find out their phone number or email address and ask them to give their interview.

Host the meeting and prepare some quality questions.

Do this as many times as you want until it does not feel scary anymore!

———

This self-belief in yourself helps you to present wonderfully on a stage and certainly, you can nail on the bigger stage if you go with good preparation.

I remember when ‘Omprakash’ and ‘Ranendra’ came to public speaking family, they were scared but I asked them to speak.

They could not do it in the first attempt but in the second, third and further attempts they were found to be doing exceptionally well.

When you fail from legendary icons or a stage that builds your self-esteem and you feel a little superior.

It eventually helps in building confidence.

Conclusion.

Fears will go nowhere, you have to manage them. Win the small events, that is how you get confidence.

It’s not new that people fumble on a stage, the audience also knows what is stage pressure. Believe in yourself, focus on content, feel thankful and be glad for everything.

I hope you do it well.

Let me know your thoughts below in the comment section.

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